Mallrats: The Next Degeneration
by Lovable Ange
Summary: Who will continue the legacy of the Mallrats now that Brodie, TS, and Jay and Silent Bob have moved on? Brodie's cousin, Lei Bruce, and her gang of friends. The next generation of mallrats is crude, rude, funny, and dare I say naughty? Read and review ple


Story Title: Mallrats: The Next Degeneration  
  
Rating: R (...This IS a fan-fic based on the work on one of the most brilliant people EVER, Kevin Smith! If one 'Fuck' gets you a PG-13...then this fic definitely gets an R for language.)  
  
Description: Since all of the 'Mallrats' have moved their separate ways, what of The Mall? Who will continue the legacy of mall-ratting? Leiana Bruce, cousin of legendary mallrat Brodie Bruce, and her bunch of hooligan friends, of course.  
  
Chapter Title: "Here We Come to Save The...Aww...Fuck It."  
  
A/N: I hope you like this first chapter. It's kind of short, but hey. It's a start. Please read and review it. Thanks  
  
Chapter One  
  
An annoyingly loud alarm clock beeps to the slump in one of two twin-sized beds. A hand pokes out from underneath the covers, slams down on the alarm clock, and then pulls the covers from off of her. She sits up and runs her fingers through her long, brown hair. Her green eyes scan the bed room and she spots her friend across the room.  
  
"Jane," said the girl, whose name was Leiana, but her friends called her Lei, "Get up, asshole. Time to get to the mall."  
  
"Wha..?" lamented Jane, "What time is it, Lei?"  
  
Lei glanced over the clock, and she replied, "It's eleven o'clock."  
  
"Th' fuck you wake me up for, then?! Why do we need to go to the mall at eleven o'clock in the morning?" Jane exclaimed. Her eyes narrowed a bit and she flung the covers over her head once more.  
  
Lei walked over and tore the blankets off of Jane. Jane curled up into a ball and shook her head. She groaned a bit and turned onto her other side, facing away from her friend.  
  
"Jane," Lei whined, "We've gotta go to the mall."  
  
"Why?" Jane sat up and squinted as Lei turned on the light to reveal a very messy apartment.  
  
"Today's no tax day," she said, "Plus I heard Jay and Bob from California. Brodie told me Jay's dating a convict...."  
  
"You really believe a word he says?" Jane asked.  
  
"He's my cousin. Of course I do...Hey! You're the one who thinks he's hot," Lei said smugly.  
  
"I...uh...ah..."  
  
"That's what I thought. Put some pants on, and let's go. Brodie told me to stop by his place before we head over to the mall."  
  
"Let me get some make-up on first," Jane said.  
  
"Oh please! He's got a girlfriend! Remember René?" Lei exclaimed, "Plus, we're only going to his comic shop."  
  
Jane groaned a little, "Why can't I have a normal room mate?"  
  
~*~  
  
The bell at the top of the door rang and Brodie's eyes turned to the door. He smirked a bit at the sight of his cousin and he put down his Big Gulp. He walked out from behind the counter and approached Lei and Jane.  
  
"Hey Brodie," Lei said.  
  
"Hey Lei. Hey Jane," greeted Brodie. He shoved his hands in his pockets and nodded at the two of them.  
  
"Why'd you say you needed to see me? I gotta get over to the mall," Lei seemed like she was in a hurry.  
  
"No tax day, huh?" Brodie asked in an all-knowing voice.  
  
"Yeah," Lei replied.  
  
"I needed you to go by the mall for me, actually," Brodie said as he walked back over to the counter. He picked the Big Gulp back up and took in a very large sip of it.  
  
"Why?" asked Jane. She crossed her arms over her chest and tilted her head to the side.  
  
"Jay and Bob are gonna be there and I want you to tell them to come by here before they go off and do God knows what," Brodie mentioned.  
  
"Why do you want them over here? Can't you just drop by their place later on?" Lei asked.  
  
"I would, but that's the thing," Brodie started, "Mrs. Phillips evicted them because of the entire C.L.I.T. thing. She said she wasn't going to let them back in until they did some major ass kissing. And you know Mrs. Phillips...That's a lot of ass to kiss."  
  
"Eeew," Jane and Lei both voiced.  
  
"So I need them to come by here and tell me about what happened," Brodie said, "I heard bits and pieces of it, but some of it was too unbelievable. I heard something about lesbian diamond thieves that hated the male world."  
  
"How cliché," said René from behind Brodie.  
  
"Yeah, babe, I was just telling 'em about it," Brodie said.  
  
"Well we'll tell them to come here. We've gotta get going," Jane said at  
the sight  
  
of René.  
  
"Yeah. Let's get going," Lei agreed.  
  
"You two have fun..." Brodie said, "And don't do anything I wouldn't do."  
  
"That includes fucking in an elevator?" asked Lei.  
  
René smirked, "No that's something he WOULD do."  
  
Brodie shushed his girlfriend and said, "That's my cousin...she doesn't want to know about that."  
  
"Yeah...he's right," Lei gagged, "I don't. C'mon let's go."  
  
Lei and Jane exited the comic store and walked over to a beat up black DeSoto. Lei climbed into the driver's seat and started the engine.  
  
"Here we come to save the....aww...fuck it," Lei said as she revved the engine a bit.  
  
Jane rolled her eyes a bit and leaned back into the seat. They took off away from the comic shop and towards the mall. Loud music blared from their speakers and the two girls banged their heads to the rhythm.  
  
End Chapter  
  
A/N: I know that there's another story out there like this. But I did NOT copy it. I only saw the other story there this morning...er... which is March 15th. I started writing this story a while ago, but I hope you like it regardless. Please read and review. I want to hear any suggestions you guys have. Just e-mail me at loveable_ange@yahoo.com . That's my real e-mail address. Well. Thanks for reading the first chapter of my fic. Don't worry. If you liked it...there's a lot more coming to ya. I'm not even near finished. 


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